Boy, I have started over and over in my life ... even with technology!
Some time ago I have a beautiful blog website with many posts, www.sendingloveblog.com, some of you may remember it. One day, all of a sudden, I was getting 500 spam messages/emails/comments every few minutes and did everything I knew how to do to make it stop. I installed this plug in for extra security because it was obvious my site had been hacked. The problem was, the security was so good, I locked myself out-lol! Well, long story short, they were going to charge me a bunch of moolah to get it straightened out, I decided to just cancel it and start over. It was a tough decision because I had MANY subscribers and I didn't want to lose them.
What a frustrating time! I had been struggling to fix it, something I had no control and just not enough knowledge. Honestly the platform I was using was a struggle for me from the get-go. It was difficult for me to put it all together and manage it.
I could relate it to my life in so many ways, I would work so hard to achieve something and it fell apart. Much like, the many relationships I have had, the marriages, the jobs, and so on.
How many times, in life, do we keep banging our head on the wall, trying to make something work? We often het stuck in the thought of, this is the way it's supposed to be, or I can make it better if I keep trying. We try and we try and we struggle and we struggle ... for such a long time.
I have learned that when the struggle gets real I need to understand I am NOT in control! Whenever I have been in that place of severe frustration, instead of continuing to struggle, I give it up to my higher power. I release the need to control it. And in that moment, there is a sense of relief. What happens next is always beyond amazing!
When you stop putting so much negative attention (worry, struggle, and fear) into something, and just sit back and realize that everything has its purpose in this life, a new bigger and better thing comes along.
Every single time I have just let it go (the worry and struggle) and quit banging my head on the door, a new door appears. In that new door, there is something waiting for me that was a better solution every time! There was a time several years ago, when I was wanting to build my wellness business and had no income coming in. I was in fear mode to bring in some income, so I applied for a job that I was well-qualified for. Well, I didn't get the job and my ego was in a place of "what, how could they not hire ME?!" The problem was, I really did not want the job, it was in an industry I had been in for over twenty years that I was trying to leave. After I settled my ego, doors started opening. I realized that I was being protected by not going back to that same old door.
Often, we keep banging on old doors because it may be familiar and change is scary. If we can come to a place where we recognize the door closed for a reason, new and better opportunities will come along. In the case of my blog. I cancelled it, had no idea what I was going to do. It took some time, but I found a new platform and it was so much easier to use, so many more features than I had before, and it was much less expensive!
In the case of my life, I look at all my hardships as lessons. I am grateful for them all, especially the hardest ones. Without the lessons I would not have become the kind, compassionate, loving person I am today. My hardest lessons have been my greatest teachers. The more pain I moved through, the more I learned and grew.
Now, when the past comes knocking, I don't answer. There is a reason it's in my past. I am only looking forward.
There is no need to go back and re-read my story as I am too busy creating a new one!
I have started over many, many times my friends. Every time, in that moment, it felt devastating. However, I am here to tell you that every time I did there has always been something amazing waiting for me. Sometimes starting over no matter how big or how small may seem scary, but I ask you to trust the process, look for the lessons, and have gratitude for the lessons.
Sending you lots of love!
Kim